Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Resumes and References

So, I'm getting ready to submit my application packet to the school system. There's to be at least one opening for September, possibly three, in the English department in the school where I'm interning. I'm being strongly encouraged by CT to apply.

I'm a veritable cauldron of feelings about the whole process.

I'm terribly excited about the prospect of working in this high school.
**I'm not sure if I've mentioned it before, but I graduated from this school nineteen years ago. CT was one of my favorite teachers and one of my primary inspirations for becoming a teacher in the first place. I can't imagine a better position for a new teacher than working in the same department with her inspiration and mentor. I've also found the English department in general to be very supportive and encouraging, and I'd like to have my fledgling year as a teacher be in a place where I can comfortably seek help if (who am I kidding?! WHEN!) I need it.

I'm nervous about the prospect of working in this high school.
**There is a particular administrator there, who happens to be tasked with overseeing the English department, who is a particularly difficult personality to get along with. I haven't had any personal encounters with the man, but people whose opinions and judgments I trust have made a lot of noise about this man's ability or, more importantly, his lack thereof, to deal with people. There's been talk of his being transferred to another department in the district, but the possibility exists that he'll still be in his position next year. I also think he'll have a say in who gets hired for the coming school year, and I wonder what he thinks of me, given that the general consensus is that he doesn't think very highly of CT.

I'm uncertain about the commitment required to take on the job.
**BIG confession here, people. I haven't had a "real" job in fifteen years. Yes, I've had part time work - I've been employed by the same health club as a fitness instructor for six years - and I've had the profound responsibilities of motherhood, but I've not had to report anywhere from nine to five (or, in this case, seven to three) in slightly less than two decades. Even though I know I can do it, and have been doing it since September, I still have to admit that it gives me pause (especially when we're deep in the heart of daylight savings time and it's dark both when I'd have to leave and when I'd get to go home).

I have a mild twinge that accepting a job now would somehow be shortchanging my children.
**My husband mentioned the other day that my taking a teaching job would mean that I would quite probably miss many of the girls' school functions; I would be unable to chaperone field trips and I would likely miss plays and assemblies. While this is certainly true, I'm not sure how much it would reasonably play into my decision to take a job or not. As it is, the girls only rarely go on field trips, and I don't volunteer to chaperone if I'm required to ride on the busses with the kids anyway because I get TERRIBLE bus sickness. Add to that the fact that we've missed the last two assemblies anyway because the girls have told us about them AFTER the fact and it doesn't seem like my being unavailable during school hours is going to prove to be a hardship for my daughters. My husband is still willing to handle the morning routine, and I WILL be home when they get home. I'm pretty sure that will mean more than my being available for the occasional special event. Besides, CT pointed out that I would be afforded personal time that could be used when the need arises.

I can do this job.
**Not only can I do it, but I can be great at it. I enjoy it, I'm excited by it, and I think I can make a difference. I'm not going into this work with a high idealism quotient; I know better than to think I can change the world by teaching literature and grammar. I do know, though, that I likely wouldn't have survived my high school years without the care and guidance of a few key adults in school. As a teenager, I was trying to function in a very troubled home and had it not been for the stability and the rationality I found in school - and, of course, the love and care of the family that adopted me as their own - I would likely have been a statistic. I can't change the world, but I may be able to touch one or two lives in a way that matters just enough.

I'm off to print out my resume and cover letter. I'll keep you posted.


Blogger vanx said...

Wow. This is really exciting! Infectiously so. My wife, who was a teacher when we got married, just went back to work fulltime for the first time in 16 years. Not as a teacher as it turns out. But she loved teaching. Her going back to work changes everything at home, but change is good. So is spare change. Don't worry.
CT sounds really great. You're in this fabulous place right now. Excellente!

March 15, 2006 10:09 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home